Wow. Almost a month since I last posted. And, still, nothing much has changed. I still binge eat. I haven’t been to the gym in over two weeks. Think I was getting frustrated that I wasn’t noticing any differences in weight, fitness levels, energy…anything. I was expecting SOMETHING in six weeks even without making dietary changes. I still go back and forth between wondering whether I should ‘do’ Beyond Chocolate or whether I should ‘do’ dieting or healthy eating instead. And so I do neither.
It doesn’t help that I am having a tough time emotionally at the moment. I want another baby. For various reasons, that can’t happen right now. Hopefully it can at some point – maybe in a few months or a year (that decision comes down to my DH) – but there’s no guarantee. To make it harder, four of my friends (who have children the same age as DS) are pregnant – one is due to give birth in just over a week’s time. So hard. Not making me feel better about myself and not helping the way I eat.
So, what is going right? I’m going to get organised is what! Organising my time is important to me as I lose so much time in the day to just wasting time playing with my phone and not getting around to doing stuff I really want or need to do. My first step has been to buy a diary as I’m not using my iPhone as an organisational tool as much as I hoped I would. So I’ve gone old school and got a physical paper diary. It appeals to my inner (or not so inner??) geek because it has stickers with it and loads of sections for different stuff. It’s the Life Book from Organised Mum and I’ve been having great fun this weekend writing in birthdays and the few plans I have for the month ahead – and adding in the co-cordinating stickers of course!
I am hoping that this can be the first step in being more organised and planning to have more interesting stuff in my life.
I am also contemplating making this blog private – as far as I know, nobody is reading it anyway – so that I feel less pressure to have a ‘perfect’ blog.